Real Time

Pearl of the Day: A true social net is a good friend

Metaphysical poet and English Clergyman, George Herbert, has been quoted with this pearl “the best mirror is an old friend.”

There are some people you go through wars with. My law school friends fall square into this survivor category. Every life stage presents its own unique challenges and some people will be there for you at each or some or none of them.

Parenting presents its own set of challenges. Some days it feels like war. You’re battling your kids, your spouse, your parents, your in-laws, the world, etc. There are no worthier battles to fight than that which helps your family but choosing your battles is a skill. Those that deplete our energy with little hope for success are simply not worth it.

Each choice has its own enablers and naysayers. There is such an excessive amount of information telling you what to do and you need to have your filter on, always! Filtering is a necessary survival skill and for me starts at the source, instincts, rationalization and then bounces to my friends and loved ones.

With the advent of social media we are seeing how quantity matters. How large your audience is must translate to your importance. This is to the external world. I too, am looking to build my “followers” into the stratosphere while maintaining my core.

Does quality trumps quantity or vice versa? Is it better to have a hundred acquaintances or a handful of really good solid and dependable friends? My grandmother followed the latter and swore by her girlfriends, some of whom she did survive a war with.

I’ve been lucky in my friends who keep me grounded in myriad ways. My girlfriends will not hesitate to be my cheerleader or smack me upside the head - whichever is necessary. I respond in kind. Our differences broadens our perspective.

When you know someone for the better part of your life you know each other so well. My best friend Melissa, (read more about her in “A Friend A Day”) is such a person. We’ve held each other’s hands through talking about boys, outfits, fiancés, weddings, children, scheduling, coupon clipping, and our new frequent topics - ailments and the prescription drugs to treat them.

The wars may never stop raging yet with your close friends helping you take the largest evolutionary leaps you will always keep winning.

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